My friend Batty Nurse asked about any differences that Adam has noticed in eliminating gluten from his diet. Well, that’s a hard one. As an Aspie, Adam doesn’t have a lot of self-awareness skills. I have learned to tell him, “Adam, you seem to be angry right now,” and he has learned not to go straight to denial, “No I’m not.” Either he doesn’t realize that he is angry or he isn’t angry but frustrated, confused, or over-stimulated. By going to a therapist that specializes in the Autism spectrum, we are both learning many good techniques for communicating. Adam is starting to stop and think a little before denying whatever I am saying. If you think this is a lot like potty training: “No I don’t have to go pee! I’m not doing the pee dance! Oops I just peed on the floor!” you are correct. It is very hard for both of us. I cannot even begin to describe how hard it is at this point.
For anyone out that that suspects that their child(ren) are on the spectrum, please seek help. Finding out that you have Asperger’s when you are 30 years old means that every behavior that is somewhat malleable as a small child is a rigid behavior that will take hard work and YEARS to budge even a small amount as an adult. I’ve done some research on rigid thinking and what I read says to work on this during early childhood- when you have a fucking prayer of helping this hallmark of autism.
Let’s get back to Adam and the effects of gluten by way of alcohol and xanax. It is the quickest route, I promise. I’ve seen Adam drunk on probably two occasions. Once before we started dating, and once the night of our wedding reception. Both times he had no idea that he was drunk. Now, I know that some people will slur, “But I’m FINE!” when they’re plowed. This is different. He really doesn’t feel it. When he started seeing a shrink, she gave him a prescription for xanax. He uses it for doing activities that will involve a lot of stimulation, like a crowded fair or zoo. Although I can tell the difference in his demeanor, and the difference is HUGE, he only feels that he is extremely tired when it starts to wear off. Unless I point out how his behavior is different in specific ways (and push through any denial) he cannot tell that the xanax is working at all.
Adam will likely not notice any difference from not eating gluten, unless it is a large and primarily physical change. Don’t ask him about his poop for the love of sweet baby Jeebus! The change will be something that I will have to look for, and currently I’m mesmerized by my talking baby. In case you were wondering, I’m not convinced that going gluten free is what caused his developmental leap. To a, I did do more research than reading a Huffington Post article, I promise. Moving from eating wheat to gluten free isn’t difficult in my house, because all dinners were gluten free already. It means that eating crappy fast food out is more difficult, but that’s a good thing. And we’ll reintroduce it at some point and try to gauge the difference.