I feel somewhat bad for disappearing without notice and then coming back only to ask for your help. But not bad enough to stop writing this and write a real post for you. I do have actual blog worthy news though! Chicken came out to his father. His father was receptive. I am fucking stunned. STUNNED.
Chicken goes to a talk therapist type person and he had been discussing coming out to his father. I made it a rule that Chicken was not allowed to fly out to see his father until he had come out to him. It has been almost three years since Chicken visited him, and I was afraid his father would flip out upon seeing his rainbow of awesome. Chicken wrote an email with his therapist, and then came home and sent it. I am so proud of him. REALLY PROUD.
His father (aka H1) replied within a few hours. The essence of the reply was “I’ve known for a long time, I love you, etc.” While I am so glad for him, it puts me once again in the position of the bad guy. H1 believes it is my turn to pay for plane tickets. I believe H1 owes me 50% of the medical bills from the last few years per our divorce papers.
I had an appointment with a lawyer and was too sick to drive with the littles to San Diego. Then I sat with the idea of spending LOTS of money attempting to get money from H1 and just couldn’t make another appointment. I might have another option, but then I had ideas. A single two part idea actually. Because I’m complicated like that. First I sent him an email to the same address Chicken emailed his coming out story. I know it is a current email and I know he checks it. What follows is most of the email. I took out some issues I’ve had with Tricare and changed Chicken’s name. You’re welcome.
“Chicken told me you two have been talking and I think that is very good for him. He’d really benefit from having a better relationship with you. Chicken also said that you’d like to have him visit this summer. That is fine with me. Chicken also said that you indicated it was my turn to pay for plane tickets. If you recall, you’ve been paying for plane tickets and I’ve been paying all the medical costs each year. In past years when you’ve seen him once during the year and my medical costs have been about equivalent things have worked out evenly.
However, you haven’t seen Chicken in almost three years and his medical costs have increased dramatically. He is getting braces later this month as well. The point of this email is to say that I need you to pay your part of Chicken’s medical bills per our divorce. I cannot do it on my own. I would prefer not to spend money on a lawyer that could be spent on Chicken. Could you please work with me on this? In the past you have ignored some emails from me, so I will take no response to mean you do not wish to help pay medical costs for Chicken.”
H1 is active duty Navy. I believe the Navy frowns at not paying for medical bills for your children. So I need your help, my dear bloggy readers. I have his name, his social, and possibly his rank if he hasn’t been promoted lately. I don’t know what base he’s stationed at because the area he lives in has multiple bases. How do I go about crawling up someone’s ass and getting help with Chicken’s medical bills without a lawyer?