This picture from Ugliest Tattoos is my way of showing you what the past few days have been like for me. You know when shit just get so fucked up and crazy that a picture of a tramp stamp that says, “Cum Slutt” just fits? Yeah, that’s my life right now. You see, once upon a time, long, long ago I was BFF with someone that I met on the innernets. Our friendship ended badly. Terribly. Horribly. Eventually I found out that there were other people that had experienced something very similar to what had happened to me. One of us started a private blog, and we used it like a forum but with only one topic: the BFF. No one from the outside was invited to see this blog except for our little group. I didn’t talk about it on the innernets because it was private.
It was a support group. We supported each other and as time went by others joined the group as they were burned by the BFF. And then one day the BFF googled herself and found a reference to the support group. She couldn’t read it because it is private. All she could do is see some of the people involved. Under the pretense of worrying about her career and upcoming custody case, she went on the offense and started up some shit. Threatening, blackmailing, etc. etc. Now, here is what she found:
Sorry for the horrible paint work. The things I blacked out were the BFF’s real name and the users that were in the group. Any person coming across this would not know what they were looking at in the least. The blog is private, so no one could get in and read. BFF had no idea what is inside, and neither would any employer, judge, ex-husband, etc. This blurb on google could in no way hurt the BFF (except for her feelings).
Have I mentioned fourteen times that the blog was private? None of my readers were invited to read. The only person in my life that knew about it was my husband. That’s it. But BFF lost her shit and started threatening law suits, emailing employers, boyfriends, etc. I got this little gem: “oh I KNOW I’ll make sure all three of YOUR sons’ fathers get some education” as a comment on my blog. (I deleted it.) Which uh?! really?! I haven’t seen my first son’s father since 1994. I have no idea where he is at this time. And what would that accomplish? You can’t lose custody of a child that you gave up for adoption 15 years prior. Any way, I didn’t DO anything and yet I’m getting threatened. She wanted me to take down the blog, which I am not the owner of and cannot take down.
Eventually, the owner took the blog down. However! Someone that is NOT me decided to lay The Smack Down on BFF, and emailed her with strict instructions: leave everyone and their families alone. At first someone else was blamed, but then I got accused of The Smack Down. Seriously? I don’t have the time or energy for a smacking. One thing that makes me sad about all of this is that I approach friendships, online and offline, differently now. Not simply because of this weekend’s drama, but all of the badness that happened.
I take things slower and I’m not so inclined to go “OMGURMYBFF4EVAR” anymore. If you want to be my friend, don’t take it personally if I don’t put out on the first date. I hate drama. I prefer raunchy jokes and saying “fuck” too many times. I’ll be glad when all of this blows over and I can get back to my miserable teething baby. Which is totally preferable to a flipped-out former BFF.
Dear Author http://www.sams-stories.com !
Yes you talent
I must be special too, since I got the pictures of you and Margaret on your first date!
For as many crazies as there are in the real world, it shouldn't be a surprise to find them around here. Sorry that you're catching the shit from it though.
Fuck.
Shit, dude, like you don't have enough to deal with. Hope it can all magically go away soon.
Otherwise, hope that you, Egg, Chicken, and TB are still smiling, laughing and loving.
Chin up, we cum slutts gotta stick together!
I too, am not a fan of teh crazy, but I do love me some cum slutts, YO!
I must really be special, since you put out for me on our first date. Of course, I was giving right back, and the men were involved and all that, but ya know.
BTW, when are you coming back up this way?
And when did you get that tat again? Cause you should really talk to your artist about your issues with grammar and spelling. For reals, yo.
I heart you.
peace…
Wow – just what everyone needs in their life. A crazy bitch making threats. I hope you got a screenshot of the comment before you deleted it. You'll need that for your restraining order.
Nice tattoo, though.
Oh the poopiness. I am sorry you are getting doused with it right now by someone who is obviously a poophead. And I am also curious about who the poophead is and if I've ever read them. Like I want MORE drama.
Thank you for adding a cum slutt comment over at m'blog. I have wanted to be crawled by google in just exactly this cumslutty manner!! And now I CAN! And without writing something MYSELF that will offend my dear ma! Score, mothafucka!
the internets is full of crazies, yo, and not always the good kind. glad you got rid of that broad.
Sam,
Glad you found me. Sorry I was gone for a while. I took your advice and bailed on the last one before it got me in trouble. lol
As to the biting, mine cut her first two bottom teeth and is now working on the top. Oh, the pain. I've bled lots and threatened early weaning but none of that seems to make a difference. She just continues to torture my poor bewbies. I'll be including a post about it soon. I'm totally gonna share that cartoon with my mom though. She will appreciate it.
Good luck getting rid of teh crazy beeotch…I can scoop some dog poo and provide a bag and I lighter if you need one. Just sayin'. I got your back. Oh, and I don't put out on the first date either. Gotta take me out at least three times.
V
how many teeth are we up to now? between yours and mine we might have a piranha. just when i thought the biting was over (ah, that week felt like VACATION) she started getting supabitchy and OMGYOUDIDN'TJUSTPUTMEBACKINMYFUCKINGBED,YOUEVILBITCH on me. crying it out can bite my ass.
Dude, that's like, CRAZYTOWN. I am so sorry.
Oh Em Gee woman! That chick is nuts. Does she know about your blog? My nutty stalker chick knows about mine – and I know she has been obsessively checking it daily. Her IP changes but her location can't. (We're on the same ISP so I know this)
My post abt her is protected but I'll give you the pw if you want. Crazy beesh!
You don't put out on the first date? Damn. And I was so hopeful.
I hope this all blows over soon.
Drama ain't my style either.
Sorry you've got caught up in something that sounds u.g.l.y
g
<—- has husband lawyer. Said lawyer is v. experienced in restraining orders. Hopefully all calms down but if you need some guidance …
I have not been reading you long, but I can already tell I like you. I think we may be BFFs 4EVAR. Rawr. Mostly just because I love cum slutts.
Sam,
"Some days you eat the bears,
Some days the bears eat you."
Happy Monday!
(and Blessed be, too!)
Brad K.
Um – I might find an attorney experienced with internet stuff. When BFF made false accusations – that gets into defamation, cyberbullying, and I slander, I think it is. And creating a public nuisance, infringing freedom of speech – and harassment. Contacting associates is terrorism just like the Somali pirates, except you don't have a destroyer with Navy Seals on hand.
You do, also, have cause to look up her ISP provider and complain – no ISP wants to have a subscriber like that dragging them around. Most ISP's have Terms of Use that prohibit making accusations, causing flaming rows. And making threats, such as contacting employers, etc. This is serious, criminal action stuff.
Luck.
Oh it all sounds like a very bad episode of Jerry Springer …
No More Drama … It ain't my shit they say… not my problem. Let it go and forget about it.
Stay kool Sam
Jeremy
Or should I say I fucking hope she fucking goes the fuck away right fucking now. hehehehe
Yikes. Sounds like a nut job. I hope she goes away soon.