Hanging Brains
Yesterday morning Adam went to the urologist and paid cash monies to have his balls whacked. I cannot even begin to tell you how excited I am about the prospect of never being pregnant again. At the same time, I’m disappointed as all fuck, because I LOVE babies and children (mine, not necessarily yours) and [...]
Birthing and Pokage
The current fuckage started on March 17th. I woke up, took Chicken and his BFF to school, ate oatmeal with Egg and did my normal routine. Egg took a huge nap, and by the time he woke up Chicken was home from school. I had just enough time to feed Egg and stop by Chick-fil-a [...]
Chicken, Hips, and Lady Gaga
I think the Spam Gods have decided to drill me until I relent and post something. I’ve gotten the usual lame spam, but one link stood out from the rest. I’ve turned the URL into a jpg because I don’t need to encourage them, but seriously? I had to share. What The FUCK?! What does [...]
I’m Not Telling
Southern California is in the midst of Weather. Our annual week of Rain Like Fucking Hell and then no more rain for a year, which results in many accidents “ZOMG RAIN!!” and flooding because our ground does not absorb water. This coincided neatly with my drive to San Diego today. Luckily, I have an AWD [...]
Crying In Public
I don’t remember if I was overly emotional when I was pregnant with Chicken, but I do remember not being weepy with Egg. Every time I heard a pregnant woman writing on the innernets about crying while watching commercials for deodorant I was mystified. With this pregnancy, I completely understand. I cry watching regular television. [...]
Fuck a B. It Has Two Holes.
I keep meaning to post my Twitter feed on the sidebar for those of you that are nosy but not into Twitter. Recently, you’ve missed that I got a nasty sinus infection and gave up fighting it on my own after a week of really gross shit in my face. I went to the damn [...]
She Doesn’t Know
I haven’t told my mother that I’m pregnant. I’ve been telling myself that it is acceptable to wait until the second trimester. I’m here and she still doesn’t know. At this point I’m planning on telling her on December 12th in front of other friends and family. It will be at an event held at [...]
Your Fish Smells
Benjamin Franklin said, “Fish and houseguests smell after three days.” I tried to impart this wisdom to my dear husband, who wanted to travel to Arkansas for TWO WEEKS. Two weeks in his grandparents’ small two bedroom home, along with his mother and his aunt. Adam’s uncle and his spouse stayed in a nearby hotel, [...]
Zoloft FAIL
So hi! What up, yo? I’m blogging from my phone tonight because I can’t be bothered to get out of my cozy bed and find my laptop. Also, Adam is snoring next to me and I think he needs a good kick. In the balls. Hang on a moment. Okay, I’m back. Apparently yanking your [...]
You Told Me
Remember when I was pregnant with Egg and it was the worst, most horrible thing ever and I swore that I would never NEVER do it again no matter how adorable Egg was? And you told me that I would forget the misery and want another baby because Egg is truly awesome. Well, I haven’t [...]

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